December 2002

A letter to the Editor:

Each year, about this time, people tend to stop thinking about the things that are missing from their lives, and stop to give thanks for everything they have. It doesn't matter what you're celebrating - Hanuakah, Christmas, Kwanza, or Ramadan - all over the world, people are giving thanks. I am no different, and this year I am very thankful. There is one object of my gratefulness, my 7-year old son, Murphy.

Many people know Murphy, and many more know who he is. But what most people do not know is what a miracle he is. Almost 7 years ago, when he was just 6 months old, he was in a car accident. He suffered multiple injuries to his brain. I was told he might not live, and if he did, he might never walk, never talk, never function in society. After all this time, he is truly a miracle. He can walk, he can talk, but most of all, he is alive, and he brings joy to everyone who comes in contact with him.

This year, instead of giving small material gifts to those who work with Murphy, I wanted to say a public "Thank You":

To my mom and Murphy's grandma, Rosemarie VanWilligen - thank you for being his most vocal proponent. Without your guidance, neither he nor I would have come as far as we have.

To the school personnel who work most closely with him - Anne McCulley, LeAnn James, Marilyn Breen, Al Rabenold (and those I've forgotten, I apologize!) - thank you for caring enough to want to see Murphy succeed.

To his school aide, Pam Flander - thank you for caring for Murphy for the past four years, both in preschool and as he has gone through Kindergarten and 1st Grade. Murphy trusts you to care for him, and that's the highest reward any of us can have.

To the lunch and custodial staff at Montezuma Elementary - thank you for watching out for Murphy, letting him spend time with you, and giving him a little help when he needs it.

To the students who enjoy Murphy's company - thank you for seeing beyond what he can't do to what he can.

To Jodi, Austin, Nate, and Macie Reams - thank you for being the second family Murphy wants to spend his free time with.

To Jenny Talley of Deep River - thank you for being Murphy's best friend in Kindergarten. He misses you this year. He and I pray that you are doing well and enjoying your new school.

To the checkers and baggers at the SuperValu - thank you for playing with Murphy while I shop, and for making sure he never goes out the door without me.

To the customers at Break Pointe and Casey's - thank you for not getting upset when he cuts in the checkout line.

To everyone in Montezuma who put up Christmas lights this year - thank you for showing some holiday spirit, and giving joy to a little boy who knows nothing but holiday spirit.

To anyone I have not mentioned - thank you for stopping to say "Hi", even when you know he might not respond.

And a prayer for all of those people who have called him "stupid", or referred to him as "that boy", or asked with disdain, "what is wrong with him?" - I pray that good things happen to you in the coming year, so that when you see people who are different, you can see them for the unique and wonderful individuals they are. The next time you see my son Murphy, look at him and realize how far he's come, without dwelling on how far he has to go.

Wishing you the best of the Holidays -

Carlie D. VanWilligen